"tomorrow you will know there’s no day better than today
we don’t see how lucky these days are til they go away
til these days go away"
- Ingrid Michaelson
(If it will work, you should go here and click "play" and try to listen to the entire song. It's the only place I could find it.)
"I will shoot you with my massive lasers." - Owen
"O-WEN!" - Luke (About 80 times a day.)
"Mom! The baby learned to fly!" Owen (Don't worry. It was a Hero Factory baby.)
"When I grow up, I'm going to drive a Mustang. A green one." - Luke
"Look at my cool outsuit." - Owen
"Owen, it's 'outfit,' not outsuit." - Luke
"Oh. Yeah. I love to play basketball and I'm really good at it." - Owen
"Really? Can you dunk?" - Luke
"What's a dunk?" - Owen
"Why is it called 'Lady and the Tramp'? Does it have a tramp?" - Luke
"Um, what's a tramp?" - Owen
"I don't know. Mom? What's a tramp?" - Luke
"When I grow up, I'm going to be an architect." - Luke
"Yeah, and when I grow up, I'm going to be a storm chaser." - Owen
These are just a few of the things I've heard my kids say over the past weekends we've been trapped together. The one-car thing is still a huge pain and I think that by the time Sunday afternoon rolls around the boys and I are starting to go a little stir-crazy. It's a lot of togetherness with almost no breaks or distractions. For all of us.
There are times when they get really loud and fight with each other and it is all I can do to not go crazy. There are times I feel like I've reminded them a billion times in one day to use their manners or pick something up or follow the house rules and I end up yelling and feeling like a total mom-failure. But there are other times, when I'm sitting between them on the couch, reading while they watch one of their shows and they are all snuggled up to me, that it's not so bad at all. And the other day we were blasting "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz and dancing around all silly and I actually thought that maybe I don't suck at this whole mom thing as much as I thought.
But when I think of those rare, almost magical mom-kid moments, I can't help but wondering what life will be like in 10 years. Will they totally despise being around me when they are sixteen and almost fifteen? Will they shut me out completely to the point that I feel like I don't even know them? When I think about that, it makes the times when we are stuck at home together, but having so much fun, seem even more valuable. Just thinking there will be a day when they not only don't need me, but don't want me around either, makes me want to capture these times and make sure I never forget them so I always have them to look back on.
I know I've said it before that I am not one of those parents who wants to keep my kids little and hates the thought of them growing up. I love seeing the new things they learn and the new stages they reach. It isn't about wanting to freeze time or not wanting to embrace the future. I certainly hope there are better days ahead than a lot of the days I've had lately, but at the risk of sounding ridiculously sappy (especially for die-hard realist who rolls her eyes at anything overly optimistic), I think what this song reminded me is about noticing the good and the love in some of these "todays." Not taking the good times for granted. I don't know if tomorrow will be better or worse. I need to capture whatever I like about today and remember how lucky it is when there is anything good.