Work has been completely insane. People disregarding established processes and operational agreements and acting like I'm some kind of magician that can just make something happen if they wish it to be so. I actually love having something urgent to work on and a rock-solid deadline that I must meet, but when people begin messing with said deadline and piling on additional responsibilities, I can feel the stress in my shoulders and in my back between my shoulder blades. I start having trouble functioning. I lose my appetite and have to remind myself to eat something and drink water so I don't end up with the mother of all tension headaches. I feel like I completely lose touch with my family and friends, as work is eating up all of my time and energy.
This week of Terrible Tuesdays has put me into a serious funk. I try to be in a good mood, but I just feel like a crazy person who could, at any moment, lash out at someone who looks at me funny. Nothing especially horrifying has happened, but on top of all the work stuff, our car needs some pricey maintenance, the boys are cranky and whiny from the weather change, all the idiots were out driving this week, I have a big event I'm hosting at my house tomorrow (and my house is a wreck and I'm blogging instead of doing anything about that), and I'm not sleeping well as a result of all the stress plus having a pretty painful tattoo addition healing on my back.
I know I should be thankful for my family and that I am still gainfully employed and I also know that the tattoo thing is entirely my own fault. I've had some good conversations with friends this week, my boss paid me the mother of all complements this week (he said that he has come to value the quality of my writing and that it totally makes up for my lack of technical background), and I love the way my tattoo turned out. But I still just feel just feel all Terrible Tuesday'd out. I'm so over it. I just want to start a new week and I want the boys to be better and I want my back to stop hurting and I want to figure out how to reduce my stress level and I want to get back into my writing. Maybe this is a start.