Monday, January 21, 2013

Willing to be Wrong

I know homosexuality can be a divisive topic. I'm sure I'm not the only one who has found that the differences in the way we approach the subject and differences in what we base our views on can make conversations about it heated and painful.  Words like "right" and "wrong" and "condone" and "agree with" and "choice" and "biology" are thrown around and often the discussion ends in frustration... or worse.

I've finally realized that for me, there is no sense in arguing.  From a scriptural perspective, there is so much debate over things like cultural context or which interpretation of what word was chosen over another and then how that was translated that I don't believe I can determine with one-hundred percent certainty what is "right" in regards to whether or not a person should be able to marry another person of the same gender.

And it makes no sense for me to argue over it because I've decided this is something about which I am willing to be wrong.

I believe in God’s grace.  I believe there are things the Church has gotten wrong in the past and that as difficult and disturbing as it is for me to wrap my mind around sometimes, His grace somehow covers even those things. I believe that if it turns out that I am wrong about homosexuality, God’s grace can cover that too.

I believe that telling an LGBT person that I don't agree with part of who they are would be like someone telling me that they realize I am a woman but they just can't accept that part of me.  I believe that telling an LGBT person that they should try to stop being LGBT would be similar to someone telling me that I should stop being a woman. I believe that if being "right" means advocating for or allowing discrimination and exclusion of LGBT persons, I will err on the side of love and inclusion.

I'm not trying to set myself as an example of what other Christians should believe.  That is something they have to prayerfully work out between their own heart and God.  I am simply saying that when I try to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and when I try to make it real in me that His love surpasses all knowledge, this is one of many things that kind of love looks like to me: it looks like treating my homosexual brothers and sisters the same way I would treat those who are heterosexual.

It means supporting the right of two consenting adults to marry. It means acknowledging and opposing discrimination whenever and wherever I encounter it.  It means showing love and working to gain understanding.  It means realizing that even if there are things that I may not fully be able to explain, I'm going to keep working to shift the balance to love and strive for understanding.

Of course, the other part of making this real is that it also means love for the people who disagree with me -- and not just the ones who respectfully disagree.  It means that I must make every effort to show the same respect and the same love to the people who say things that to me sound nothing like God's love or who advocate a position I think is wrong.  It isn't okay for me to err on the side of love for only one group or one school of thought and then behave as though God's love doesn't apply to the others.

My heart must cling to grace for every one of us and pray that regardless of which side is right, His love will cover over it all.


  1. "I will err on the side of love and inclusion." I agree so much! Wonderful Post!

    1. Thanks Jenny! Looking forward to our discussion on this one!