Tuesday, August 11, 2009

He's Just Not That Into You

So... I rented this movie, 'He's Just Not That Into You' and watched it Sunday night. Oh my. Sure, there were some funny scenes and the chemistry between Gennifer Goodwin and Justin Long was great. But I am getting so tired of these romantic comedies that portray married people as all unhappy and just waiting for the opportunity to cheat on each other because it is their spouse's fault they are unhappy. Seriously?

Three things. First, married people are not all completely miserable people who secretly despise each other. Sure, we're not always happy, but neither are single people or dating people or 'living in sin' (sorry Irena for stealing your line) cohabitants. No one is always happy and if they say they are they are lying. But married people are not all the most unhappy and unfulfilled of all people on the earth. It irritates me that so many movies portray us as such.

Second, we do not all spend our days just trying to resist (and then finally giving in to) the urge to jump into bed with every attractive person who comes along. Movies would have you believe that because we are all so unhappy in our marriages we all just want to grab a little happiness for ourselves by getting it on with any hot, willing person who crosses our path. Sure, you don't stop noticing someone is attractive just because you're married, but ew. The thought of infidelity makes me want to vomit.

Third, why does it always seem that in most movies when a man discusses why he got married it was because the woman gave an ultimatum? This idea that most men would not get married unless somehow tricked, forced, or pushed into it is sad and can encourage women to think that is just how it is. Marriage isn't something people have to do so they shouldn't unless they are with someone to whom they want to be married. Yes, I know the ultimatum happens in real life, but guys, grow a pair! If you do not want to marry someone aren't you better off without her than married to her? Let her leave! Let her be with someone who wants her. And girls, if it comes down to you having to resort to an ultimatum, please realize that you are better off spending the weekends single and out with your girlfriends than married and home alone wondering where your husband is and why he doesn't seem happy with you.

I know relationships are complicated, but I think there are men out there who want to be married to their wives and there are women out there who are willing to just let the relationship evolve. When both are on the same page, they can get married because they are both ready. And if they are never ready then one of them moves on or they are both content to just wait and see what it becomes. Why do most movies want to deny that this could happen? I'm not a relationship expert, but maybe if there were more movies that portrayed healthy relationships (married or not) then people would see that there are alternatives to the sad, pathetic ones they see on the screen.

Okay. I'm finished with my rant now. I'm sure I've said a lot of things that people would disagree with, but something about this movie really got to me and I needed to get it off my chest. The end.

No comments:

Post a Comment